>> Friday, September 30, 2011
Let me begin with a promise: I will NOT carry on, week after week, boring you with lion posts.
|I'm a Coward|
When I started my blog, I had a specific purpose in mind. The whole premise behind the theme is that I would learn to deal with my fears of "coming out" in regards to being a writer. That I would write from my heart, in order to use my talent.
What I didn't know was that God was going to use the fear blog to point out how fear-filled I really am. To be gut-wrenchingly honest, I found out that actually...I'm a coward. That's the bad news.
But thank goodness there is good news too! If not, my inner-kitten would take up permanent residence and the lioness would move on down the road, never to be heard from again.
The good news?
I'm trying to learn to be strong and courageous in a scary world. The book of Joshua is a fav of mine. Here was a guy that was given instructions from the Lord and stood quaking in his sandals. But over and over, he was told: Be strong and courageous...because you don't fight the battle alone: God goes before you. So man up, and move forward. (My paraphrasing.)
Back to the lion thing: Yes, I'm the lioness. He made it very clear when I was setting up my blog that I was NOT to be the lion. I thought it had to do with the fact that I'm obviously female (although no one could EVER accuse me of being girly.)
Now I don't think that at all.
If you look at a lion pride, the hierarchy is that the male is in charge, runs the pride but what is his main job? Protecting the lioness and the cubs. She does the work (hunting, watching the youngsters, etc.) while he stands guard to keep them all safe.
He goes before her.
In the famous words of my pal John Bevere: "Are you getting this?"
It's really pretty simple: Yes, I need to do the work. I need to put on my big-girl panties, stand up, and be strong and courageous. I need to prepare myself for battle, put on the armour He provides me, and move forward. There is also much work to do on my character flaws, temper, and how I react to things. Lots of work. Trust me. And of course, I need to move forward with my writing in order to be a good steward of the talent he has given me.
BUT I don't need to struggle alone. He goes before me. He is my protector, guide, and shield. Check out the scripture--it's all in the instruction manual.
Does it come easy? No. Do I often fail? On a regular basis. Do I have hope that he will never leave me and goes in front of me all the way? Oh yeah.
Time to rise up, take him at his word, and get to work.